Such a sensitive young child, an antenna picking up energy near and wide and the atmosphere around her. It was overwhelming; too much negativity, a father who couldn’t show his love, she learned later it wasn't his fault. Her uncle terrifying her, being bullied at school, a cousin a lot older than her when staying with her family, molesting her at five years old. It didn't help her brother tormenting but that's what younger brothers can do. Her father promising she was going to have a baby sister and then her brother came along. This was confusing and she said to send him back she didn't want him. Parents don't realize what they say and tell their children can affect them.  Not having any really good male role models only her grandpa but he lived in Manchester and she didn't see him very often. A lost little soul, not wanting to be seen, a child who couldn’t learn, having difficulties, finding out she was  dyslexic. In a bubble and a world of her own and stress can do that to a child shut them down. This is what happened to her after her brother was born. They never knew of these disorders, children like her were looked upon as being dumb, not getting the help they really needed and especially if you were a child from a working class family. She was born with a deformity and that's why she would get pain in her chest, couldn't get her breath when running. When starting school wearing glasses with a band aid over her right frame because of her stigmatism, she looked hideous and couldn't see the blackboard that didn't help her situation. Then later braces because of protruding teeth, being working class you didn't see children with braces. She did look like an alien from a different planet, anyway that's how she felt. She was half way up there and preferred it that way. Her connected to the clouds on another hemisphere .

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In Dec of 2021 learning and finding out she definitely was an empath and she thought it was because of her syndrome high functioning autism. Now this all started to made sense. Extremely interesting in what she had discovered from this psychiatrist Dr. Judith Orloff. This doctor working  in the medical field and she shared her story in her interviews and books she had written. Dr. Orloff explains how she could understand and connected to her highly sensitive patients. The reason why? she was empath and felt their sensitive souls and this is why she wrote books on this subject. Listening to all this information, she thought could this doctor be autistic? The reason why many female where never diagnosed and are some of her patients autistic as well? When you listen to David Attwood there were some similarities to high functioning autism.  Just a feeling and not everyone is.  As Attwood said they make great doctors,  psychologists  and psychiatrists the reason why this is? They have empathy knowing how it feels to be highly sensitive to their environment and feeling everything intensely and can be overwhelming and learning coping skills. As  Dr. Judith Orlofff said in one of her interviews she felt like an alien and she has wrote about this and that's how she has always felt. You know what it doesn't matter we are all here trying to fit in the best way possible. 

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          The positive she was very blessed God was there to help this young autistic girl and having a mother like hers was also a blessing. She had an incredible imagination, an artistic flair; using her intuition and inner wisdom to get through the difficult times and never blamed. What happens if you do? You will never learn from your mistakes, her life lessons and experiences she had to go through and in silence most of the times, not understanding what happened to her. They were there to teach her and give her strength. It gave her character, her happy disposition and her personality started to shine through. She learned being on this earth to bush through and as she got older to hide her insecurities with her bubbly personality, no one else can do it for her. It will make you stronger and hope wiser and not to follow like a sheep. She looks back and had two amazing women that she didn’t understand at the time, they had such an influence on her life. Both full of knowledge and having the knowing way back when. Being psychic her mom would say if you can't see it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. She and her twin sister were into astrology, the planets and interested in horoscopes.  She had no idea of their great gifts they had, especially her auntie a Tasseographer, a tea-leaf reader, extremely talented. She had many clients coming to see her where she lived in a small village and became friends with a gay gentleman. He was a client, they had a lot in common and very flamboyant and the owned a  small antique shop in the high street. The unknown did scare her because of the experiences she endured. When having to stay with her auntie in 1976 before coming to Canada it was definitely something she will never forget.